You Choose

We are up at the hospital once again doing, so far, what I would consider the worst form of chemo ever!! Ken and I absolutely both hate it. (I think we might still have to do it one more time, but it is way in the future.) It is the high dose metholtrexate. It doesn't drop Odette's counts very much, which is nice because then she can go out in the hallway to be on "parade", but it causes all sorts of havoc with her skin and digestive system. Sores everywhere, yucky skin and puke city is what we can expect for the next week or two. Absolutely miserable!

I was feeling rather irate at the situation here at the hospital and my life at home, when it dawned on me. You choose. You can choose to be mad at what life brings you, or you can choose to make joy and laughter. (Yes, the thought came to my mind, "When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.") I went out to get my breakfast, and there wasn't one person who was mean and glaring at others. All would say "hi, how are you?" and would smile. People are always laughing and choosing to have fun here. If anyone has a reason to be mad at the world, it would be some of the families here at ICS, but why choose to be mad? That just makes matters worse...makes you not be able to deal well with all other aspects of reality. Makes you always grumpy, unfriendly, scary and sometimes even can cause health issues. Like the sign at my house says, "A smile is like the sunshine." (It actually is a primary song that continues and says "it brightens up the day, it makes the world look brighter and chases clouds away.") This is so true. The more I smile, try and laugh and I choose to be happy, the more the bad things just slip away. (No, they don't go away, but I am able to better deal with them, or they don't seem so awful.) People around me are also more willing to be helpful and the kids are always more obedient! (This is an awesome bonus!)

I think that in choosing to be happy we are also realizing to let things go. There are many things in life that we can't control. If you can't control or change it, then you just need to let it go and choose to be happy. Don't dwell on it, just smile. You can't control how someone else drives, so just ignore them and keep driving your way. You can't control how others behave, what illness' come your way, or if you can keep your perfect job in this economy(if you have the perfect job!) I have learned that I need to let things go that I can't control or change and I have been much more relaxed and happy with my life. If I don't just let go, I get really irritated at almost everything going on around me, even the good. Just accept life and move on and make your own happiness.

Odette has obviously chosen to be happy with life and she definitely could choose otherwise. She isn't up here being grumpy and yelling at people. No, she is laughing, smiling, talking and even dancing. If she can choose to be happy in her situation, then I should be able to do the same. YOU CHOOSE...