Seven Months

Seven months ago, you would not have been able to convince me that I would make it to January.  It seemed like an eternity away and back then, even one day lasted forever!  I also never thought that the stress of things would subside and I would be able to relax some.  What seemed so stressful and difficult to do has now become second nature, like changine a diaper(we also do plenty of this!).  A puked out feeding tube use to bring me to tears because I didn't want to put it in and I would pray the only time she would puke it out would be when the home health nurse was here.  Now, I am known to even pull it out myself because it can irritate her throat and cause even more than normal barfing if not cleaned or replaced.  It has become part of the norm, as did dressing changes, running fluids, flushing central line, taking temperatures and giving medicines...not that we like doing it, but we do it. (No, I do not really want to be a nurse in the future.)

Now, while we are concerned about all sorts of stuff, we have one main concern--getting Odette to eat.  She, for a few months at the hospital loved to eat, especially mashed potatoes and gravy, but after the last three treatments, she decided it wasn't worth doing.  We are trying pretty much anything...she loves to play with food and say "Mmmm" and hold it up to her mouth, but it never goes inside for swallowing.  I am sure that someday she will eat pretty much everything, it is just getting to that day that seems difficult.

Our other "concern" is we are running a pharmacy at our house!  I wish that Odette would get calories out of all the medicine she has to take!  I wish this, not just because she needs the calories, but because all of her medicines cost about $60 a week, which is what we usually spend on groceries!!  I am attempting to slowly wean her from her anti-nausea drugs, but each time I get her off one, we go in for some stronger chemo and she needs it again.  Oh well, I will take the drug store over living in a 5x8 cubical that doesn't even compare to a Marriott Hotel, but costs at least 10 times for a night!

In seven months, we have cried, laughed, screamed, loved, learned, played, giggled, drove thousands of miles and caught lots of puke.  It has been rough, scary and difficult, but there are a few things we have perfect knowledge of: Families are the best people to be around, our Heavenly Father LOVES us and Cancer Sucks for everyone.