LIVE

I can't believe that is already January, the beginning of yet another year!  I went to take the garbage out the other day and froze my toes in the flip flops I had on.  In my mind, it is still June.  I haven't mentally gotten past the words, "Your daughter has leukemia."  To me, time seems to have stopped, but obviously it is still going on.  It is so strange to me how your mind can do this, probably as a defense mechanism.  I feel so awful, I have missed so much that has changed an happened lately, being stuck in my month of June.

So with the enlightenment of knowing it is a new year, we had our yearly family home evening to discuss making resolutions.  The kids had some really cute ones: Don't interrupt (especially when mom is on the phone with the hospital), work faster(so they can play more I am sure!) and smile more(my personal favorite).  Me, I had a hard time thinking of anything.  I use to make a goal to learn a new skill every year, but until the kids are bigger and I have more time this isn't such a wise idea.  The things I have learned are getting to big and expensive and I like them all!  (One room isn't big enough to hold it all.)  I am also way to tired to make a list of goals because that is just another "to do list" and I have enough on my current list already, so I was inspired by a friend who chose just a word for the year...what an awesome idea to improve on one word...so the word I chose is LIVE.  That might seem like a dumb word, but after just surviving the past 7 months, it seemed fitting.  I haven't taken time to live lately.  I am merely in survival mode.   I am going to try and live in the moment and enjoy it.  Not be so wrapped up in things with Odette that I don't notice life going on with those around me, afterall I have so many other wonderful people in my life.  I am going to try to live life a little more fully and enjoy every moment because the moments are passing by, never to return.  I hope you all have a great new year!